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But how often do we hear the nitty-gritty of how we can actually better understand our deepest desires and most embarrassing questions? Bustle has enlisted Vanessa Marin, a licensed fan psychotherapist based in San Francisco, to help us out with the details. No gender, sexual orientation, or question is off limits, and all questions remain anonymous.

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Now, onto this week's topic: How to talk dirty without feeling like an idiot. My boyfriend and I have pretty good sex, if I do say so.

Only problem is, when it's comes to talking dirty, I have no clue what to. I know things might be hotter if whst actually talked to each. How do I talk dirty without feeling like an idiot? I hear change location tinder it from my clients all the time. So they settle for quiet sex because it seems like the lesser of two evils.

Talking dirty is a great skill to learn because it brings liveliness into the bedroom in so many ways. It keeps you present in the moment. It develops your communication abilities.

It taps into your primal nature. It connects you to your sense of pleasure, and can actually help you feel even more turned on.

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And there are plenty of ways to do it without feeling like a dumbass. Here are my tips.

I once worked with a woman who was very vocal in the bedroom — but hated herself for it. She only said the things she thought her boyfriend wanted to hear, and she felt like she was putting on an act.

I think this is where a lot of people go wrong with sex talk. Give yourself permission to just be you in the bedroom.

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Be authentic. Learning something new is always challenging. Embrace your growing pains.

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You can actually start talking dirty on your. If you feel particularly bashful, start with moaning.

Let out a few sighs or groans, or breathe heavily. Try saying a few simple things like "that feels good" or "yes.

What can you tell a guy to turn him on

Are you more comfortable saying "dick" or "penis? Do you like being more playful and teasing, or more serious and erotic? If you find things that feel uncomfortable, practice saying them a few times before declaring them not your style. If your partner is already vocal in the esquire massage erie, try taking some cues from.

What types of things does he usually say? How does he tend to talk to you?

What aspects of his dirty talk to you like or dislike? In terms wgat what to say, focus on what feels good in the moment.

Shat that with your partner in the words that feel comfortable to you. Most men appreciate hearing your enthusiasm. You can convey a lot in just a few words! If there are certain things you feel uncomfortable saying, fuck sex long 715 ri and your partner can create your own code words.

For example, most women hate the phrase "eat me out," but you could say "I want your tongue down there" or "I want you to do that thing I like. It's OK to be turned on by words like "slut" and "whore" that would offend you outside the bedroom.

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That's part of what you're playing with — taking back derogatory, "pornstar" language and turning it into something that turns you on, rather than something that men might use to degrade you.

Once you get more comfortable being verbal, you may want to start getting more graphic.

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Describe what you want in greater. During all of your experiments with talking in the bedroom, keep in mind that no one is judging you. Have fun with it!

Want more of Too Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our new podcast, I Want It That Waywhich delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship, and find more on our Soundcloud page.

Want more sex? Of course you. So download Bustle's app from iTunes for all the most recent sex and relationships news, advice, memes, and GIFs from around the Web.

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Above All Else, Be Yourself.